So a friend reminded me of my blog, and I decided it was time to do an update :)
We're half way through the semester and life seems to be moving at a rapid pace! We just had spring break. I didn't really get a break, but I met a lot of amazing people and toured parts of Canada and the east coast on band tour. I made some of the most amazing friends, and Niagra Falls in arguably one of the greatest places I have ever been.
This week is social work awareness week. There are a lot of activities and a lot of things to worry about. So on top of all my school work, there is a lot of other activities!
As far as life and school goes, it's pretty much normal. There are a lot of things that I think about, a lot of things that I miss and definitely a lot of tears, and emotions along the way.
I think I cry myself to sleep almost every night. My life is a constant roller coaster of emotions, but I know that everything is for the best. The lives of my family and many others were impacted almost two months ago. That day was a day that I will never forget, nor will I forget the girl who's lives touched sooo many. Trisha Lynn Wood was like a little sister to me and I will never forget her smile, her amazing little giggle, and her wonderful personality. She was one of those girls that wasn't afraid to speak her mind, but who was also everyones friend.
I miss Trisha more than words can describe. There are a lot of things about her life that I will never forget. Most of all I will never forget the relationship she had with the Lord. Trisha spent many hours studying her bible and talking about her relationship with the Lord. Her life was a constant testimony of the Lord living in and through her.
I spent a lot of time asking why, why Trisha, why now, what did she do to deserve this, and why did she have to get taken away she had so much left to do with her life. But that's not the question I should be asking. I should be asking what, how and when. What can I do to make her memory live on and what should my relationship with Christ look like. How can I show the love Trisha had for the Lord and the love that I have for my Savior. And when. When will I get to see her again - because I know I will.
Even in one of the worst moments of my life, I can see God at work. I saw God working in a school full of kids who sat and listened to a few pastors pray, read the word, and come together to lift each other up. I saw God in the sun shine on the morning of the funeral. In the streets lined with servicemen, in the 100s of people in the church, in the eyes of so many friends, through the words of so many parents, in the hearts of Trisha's parents, and in so many other areas of life.
One thing that I will always remember is the words shared with the friends and family on that fateful day. Philippians 4:13 - "I can do all things through Christ, who strengtheneth me."
Love you Trisha <3
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Social Work - My Work
I'm sitting here writing about why I want to be a social worker and realized that I needed a place to brainstorm and a place to let you guys know why I want to be a social worker.
Social workers help those who are in need by providing services for those couldn't otherwise locate the services available to them or use their own tools to reach a higher potential. I want to be the person that is there to help, when you feel like there is nothing left, and nowhere to turn to. I want to be the light at the end of a long dark tunnel.
Having dealt with the stress of being a college student - lets make that a BROKE college student. Factor in the fact that I'm constantly worried about something, the lack of sleep, and the ups and downs of being bipolar, having a really high anxiety level. All of these, are the reason that I want to be a social worker.
That may sound strange - I can't handle my own life so I want to help someone elses. The problem isn't that I don't know the answers to a few of my problems. I do. The problem is that a lot of times I choose not to implement them. I choose to avoid the things that I know will help me.
I want to educate, inform, and help those like me, who maybe have a few answers. But don't know how to follow through on them.
Social workers help those who are in need by providing services for those couldn't otherwise locate the services available to them or use their own tools to reach a higher potential. I want to be the person that is there to help, when you feel like there is nothing left, and nowhere to turn to. I want to be the light at the end of a long dark tunnel.
Having dealt with the stress of being a college student - lets make that a BROKE college student. Factor in the fact that I'm constantly worried about something, the lack of sleep, and the ups and downs of being bipolar, having a really high anxiety level. All of these, are the reason that I want to be a social worker.
That may sound strange - I can't handle my own life so I want to help someone elses. The problem isn't that I don't know the answers to a few of my problems. I do. The problem is that a lot of times I choose not to implement them. I choose to avoid the things that I know will help me.
I want to educate, inform, and help those like me, who maybe have a few answers. But don't know how to follow through on them.
Monday, January 31, 2011
Silence
Well.. It's been a month. A month of class. A month of living on my own. And a month of silence.
I originally thought that I was moving closer to campus to be closer to friends. (or to make new friends). I thought I wanted to be around people and be accepted by people and that that meant living on my own. Since moving to Sioux Center. I've realized that I spend a lot of time just being alone. Sitting in my apartment in the quiet. Doing nothing but homework. Oh, sometimes I will spend some time listening to music or watching TV, but even that is rare. I find that I spend so much time reading text books and studying and writing papers that I really don't have time for much else.
I've learned to appreciate the silence and can even say that I love when it's quiet. It gives me time to think. to question things. It also gives me time to listen.
I know - weird right - listen? Listen to what? Listen to the silence. I find that when its quiet and I'm just laying on the bed or sitting on the couch, I hear things. Not like I'm crazy and see people that aren't there - although sometimes I question that too. But I hear things like "You're beautiful the way you're created." "I love you." and "Don't forget about me."
I feel like for a long time I spent a lot of time ignoring those voices. The ones that remind me that I am a child of God and that I have a life in him. Yeah, life here is crazy. I've been through a lot. But I didn't take the time to listen, and realize that whatever I'm going through, God is right there. I just need to seek him out. Praise him in the storm, and listen in the silence. Because His voice is a silent roar, and a constant reminder that I am not alone.
I originally thought that I was moving closer to campus to be closer to friends. (or to make new friends). I thought I wanted to be around people and be accepted by people and that that meant living on my own. Since moving to Sioux Center. I've realized that I spend a lot of time just being alone. Sitting in my apartment in the quiet. Doing nothing but homework. Oh, sometimes I will spend some time listening to music or watching TV, but even that is rare. I find that I spend so much time reading text books and studying and writing papers that I really don't have time for much else.
I've learned to appreciate the silence and can even say that I love when it's quiet. It gives me time to think. to question things. It also gives me time to listen.
I know - weird right - listen? Listen to what? Listen to the silence. I find that when its quiet and I'm just laying on the bed or sitting on the couch, I hear things. Not like I'm crazy and see people that aren't there - although sometimes I question that too. But I hear things like "You're beautiful the way you're created." "I love you." and "Don't forget about me."
I feel like for a long time I spent a lot of time ignoring those voices. The ones that remind me that I am a child of God and that I have a life in him. Yeah, life here is crazy. I've been through a lot. But I didn't take the time to listen, and realize that whatever I'm going through, God is right there. I just need to seek him out. Praise him in the storm, and listen in the silence. Because His voice is a silent roar, and a constant reminder that I am not alone.
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
New Beginnings
Hey all,
So yesterday was the first day of class. I thought I was prepared - I found out otherwise. I felt like I was running around and had no idea what I was doing. It was like freshman year all over again. (this ridiculous cold does not help)
I had two classes yesterday and both of them are Social Work Classes. They are in the afternoon which is nice because I can sleep in if I want to - but I haven't really been doing that! I have 3 classes today. Two of them are generals and the other is a night class. I'm kind of nervous about the night class. I think it'll be tough to stay on top of.
But as nervous as I was/am about starting a new semester. I am really excited about it! This new semester brings with it a lot of new changes. I moved to campus housing and have my own apartment! It's really spacious and I love that I have a lot of space and can do what I want with it!
This semester also brings another change. Friends are returning and I'm seeing more and more familiar faces -which is awesome! It's great that my friends can be gone for 9 months and when they're back it's like they never left!
That said. I think the biggest thing that is changing in my life - is my faith. Never have a felt closer to God. To me this is the most exciting thing. I always 'believed' in God. But I never knew what that meant. I had all the text book answers and could probably defend my faith just as well as the next guy. However, that faith was never really mine. To me being a Christian was going to church- twice, arguing if someone didn't agree with you, and living the 'right way'. Now I'm beginning to realize that I need to take the faith that I have been taught and make it my own.
Faith isn't an abstract. It is real. It is here. God isn't someone far away (even though there are times where I might believe that or it may feel like He is nowhere near me.) God isn't just walking beside me holding my hand. No - God is IN me. Isn't that an amazing thought! God is someone who is closer than a brother (and sometimes I don't think that's possible either - I love my brothers :) )
This past week I have seen God work a lot in my life - and in my heart. I've made a lot of mistakes in my life. There are a lot of things I'm not proud of. However, just on Sunday we heard in the sermon that while the true believer is going to sin - only they will actually feel guilt and sorrow. Hearing that was such a relief to me. It was something that I needed to hear and it was followed with - But we have hope. He have a hope that is so sure that it's not even really a hope but a blessing. Christ WILL come again, and Christ will be with me until then.
That's all for now - oh and Mom and Dad I know this will make you cry... but I want you to know that I LOVE YOU and thanks for everything :)
So yesterday was the first day of class. I thought I was prepared - I found out otherwise. I felt like I was running around and had no idea what I was doing. It was like freshman year all over again. (this ridiculous cold does not help)
I had two classes yesterday and both of them are Social Work Classes. They are in the afternoon which is nice because I can sleep in if I want to - but I haven't really been doing that! I have 3 classes today. Two of them are generals and the other is a night class. I'm kind of nervous about the night class. I think it'll be tough to stay on top of.
But as nervous as I was/am about starting a new semester. I am really excited about it! This new semester brings with it a lot of new changes. I moved to campus housing and have my own apartment! It's really spacious and I love that I have a lot of space and can do what I want with it!
This semester also brings another change. Friends are returning and I'm seeing more and more familiar faces -which is awesome! It's great that my friends can be gone for 9 months and when they're back it's like they never left!
That said. I think the biggest thing that is changing in my life - is my faith. Never have a felt closer to God. To me this is the most exciting thing. I always 'believed' in God. But I never knew what that meant. I had all the text book answers and could probably defend my faith just as well as the next guy. However, that faith was never really mine. To me being a Christian was going to church- twice, arguing if someone didn't agree with you, and living the 'right way'. Now I'm beginning to realize that I need to take the faith that I have been taught and make it my own.
Faith isn't an abstract. It is real. It is here. God isn't someone far away (even though there are times where I might believe that or it may feel like He is nowhere near me.) God isn't just walking beside me holding my hand. No - God is IN me. Isn't that an amazing thought! God is someone who is closer than a brother (and sometimes I don't think that's possible either - I love my brothers :) )
This past week I have seen God work a lot in my life - and in my heart. I've made a lot of mistakes in my life. There are a lot of things I'm not proud of. However, just on Sunday we heard in the sermon that while the true believer is going to sin - only they will actually feel guilt and sorrow. Hearing that was such a relief to me. It was something that I needed to hear and it was followed with - But we have hope. He have a hope that is so sure that it's not even really a hope but a blessing. Christ WILL come again, and Christ will be with me until then.
That's all for now - oh and Mom and Dad I know this will make you cry... but I want you to know that I LOVE YOU and thanks for everything :)
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Just my thoughts
Today I was driving home from hanging out with one of my best friends. A song came on the radio and I found myself humming along - even though I had no idea what the words were. Maybe it's because I don't take the time to listen, or maybe because chords and tunes just kind of make sense - but somehow I knew the tune.
It was then that I realized that even though I could never sing that song back to you, it made an impact. If I ever hear it again, I'm sure that I'll be humming along and maybe eventually hear the words. Maybe that's not the kind of impact you thought it would make - but it still change a small part of me.
Well what if we are all meant to be a small impact on each other. Like the tune of a song, not even spoken words we can change those around us. By behavior and attitude we can change the way that we view the world, the way that others view us, and the way that we view others. What an amazing accomplishment that is.
There is something about knowing that you can make a difference that makes life oddly satisfying. It's great to know that no matter what - you CAN change something...
I realized another thing while listening to that song. I realized that I don't take the time to listen to the world around me. How can I expect others to listen to me, and to hear my tune - when I am sooo busy and caught up in my own world that I can't see theirs. That's my fault.
It took someone I know to show me that it's not always about me - not about my problems, my world, or my life. There are worse things in life. I said it best myself when I told him that "everyone hates life - at some point, some just choose to make the change." Maybe if I took the time to listen to someone other than myself I could realize that life's not all about the ups and downs, but the people there to help you through it.
We all make an impact - good or bad - so why not make it one that counts?
It was then that I realized that even though I could never sing that song back to you, it made an impact. If I ever hear it again, I'm sure that I'll be humming along and maybe eventually hear the words. Maybe that's not the kind of impact you thought it would make - but it still change a small part of me.
Well what if we are all meant to be a small impact on each other. Like the tune of a song, not even spoken words we can change those around us. By behavior and attitude we can change the way that we view the world, the way that others view us, and the way that we view others. What an amazing accomplishment that is.
There is something about knowing that you can make a difference that makes life oddly satisfying. It's great to know that no matter what - you CAN change something...
I realized another thing while listening to that song. I realized that I don't take the time to listen to the world around me. How can I expect others to listen to me, and to hear my tune - when I am sooo busy and caught up in my own world that I can't see theirs. That's my fault.
It took someone I know to show me that it's not always about me - not about my problems, my world, or my life. There are worse things in life. I said it best myself when I told him that "everyone hates life - at some point, some just choose to make the change." Maybe if I took the time to listen to someone other than myself I could realize that life's not all about the ups and downs, but the people there to help you through it.
We all make an impact - good or bad - so why not make it one that counts?
Monday, December 27, 2010
It's Almost 2011
Well with the new year approaching a lot of us tend to look back. We look back on the year we survived through and go wow I changed a lot.
I remember making all those new years resolutions in December just a year ago - in fact I think I even wrote them down somewhere. But usually by about mid January I've tossed them aside and started on something new.
Looking back on the last year I went through a lot. There were a lot of highs and lows and a lot of people who touched me in a lot of different ways. If it weren't for some of those people and friends and family I wouldn't be here to begin making plans for a new year, a new me, and new dreams.
I wonder what this years dreams will hold. I wonder what I will go through, how I will change and what type of life I will end up with. However, usually about this time of year a lot of us are reminded about the life that changed our lives forever.
I'm not sure why it takes a special day - because it's something that we should celebrate every day. But as we go to those Christmas concerts and hear all the wonderful songs we should probably remember that this day is something that should be sung about every day of the year! (Not that I want to listen to Christmas music all year round - unless someone starts writing some new songs) Christ's birth isn't something that we need to be reminded of on December 25. It's something that we need to praise God for every day. He sent his son so that we could have a new life - and what better time to be reminded of that than at the beginning of a new year!
So while you're attending a thousand family functions in this next week and then making new years resolutions to lose x amount of pounds and find that perfect job or start your family in the year 2011, remember that every day is a gift. Each moment is precious and brings you closer to the promise that we have all been given.
Be thankful for the families we have, look forward to the family we will gain and most of all give thanks and praise to the one who gives us all things :)
I remember making all those new years resolutions in December just a year ago - in fact I think I even wrote them down somewhere. But usually by about mid January I've tossed them aside and started on something new.
Looking back on the last year I went through a lot. There were a lot of highs and lows and a lot of people who touched me in a lot of different ways. If it weren't for some of those people and friends and family I wouldn't be here to begin making plans for a new year, a new me, and new dreams.
I wonder what this years dreams will hold. I wonder what I will go through, how I will change and what type of life I will end up with. However, usually about this time of year a lot of us are reminded about the life that changed our lives forever.
I'm not sure why it takes a special day - because it's something that we should celebrate every day. But as we go to those Christmas concerts and hear all the wonderful songs we should probably remember that this day is something that should be sung about every day of the year! (Not that I want to listen to Christmas music all year round - unless someone starts writing some new songs) Christ's birth isn't something that we need to be reminded of on December 25. It's something that we need to praise God for every day. He sent his son so that we could have a new life - and what better time to be reminded of that than at the beginning of a new year!
So while you're attending a thousand family functions in this next week and then making new years resolutions to lose x amount of pounds and find that perfect job or start your family in the year 2011, remember that every day is a gift. Each moment is precious and brings you closer to the promise that we have all been given.
Be thankful for the families we have, look forward to the family we will gain and most of all give thanks and praise to the one who gives us all things :)
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